a girl could get used to this, plus turtle power

December 23, 2005

You know what is highly, highly underrated? Sex first thing in the morning. I mean, wow. I never knew. Like...my senses have awakened or something! It's good awesomeness.

So, yeah, I'm still seeing Josh...last night was the third time in a week. Before that, I hadn't seen him since 1998. Fun. I gotta tell you, waking up next to him is pretty damn great. In spite of myself, I am falling pretty hardcore for him nd the feelings between us are all over the place and it's not something I'm used to and it feels really good and he makes me happy and safe and fulfilled, and right now...that's all I want in my life. Someday this WILL end and it won't be pretty in any kind of way, but for now...it's pure awesomeness.

And like...the sex is good, but the stuff leading up to the sex is better. He's so sensual and takes his time and really wants to make everything last as long as possible. A girl can get used to this kind of relationship, I'm telling you. That freaks me out hardcore, but what can I say...I have one weakness in this world (other than mexican food) and that is being fulfilled right now, so that's pretty much all I have to say for myself. It's all about the intimacy, baby. All about it.

Meanwhile, have an awesome Christmas, those of you who do that kind of thing. I am looking forward to giving and receiving stuff. Rock on with that shit! Well, now I get to go back to work and rock the spanish videos that I'm working on today. I know you're jealous. But yesterday I did Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! TURTLE POWER!

Before I go, I'd like to share a song. I'm in that stage right now where I can see me and Josh in every stupid song I hear, but this song came on the radio yesterday and I almost had an emotional episode or something. Not only was it popular the first time around (in 1997), not only did I go to the concert with my brother in Austin the week after me and Josh broke up, I'm just...really feeling this song right now, almost as hardcore as I was feeling There Is No Arizona a few months ago. So here it is. Have good good.

*****

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Well you got your reasons
And you got your lies
And you got your manipulations
They cut me down to size

Sayin� you love but you don�t
You give your love but you won�t

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Seems the road less traveled
Show�s happiness unraveled
And you got to take a little dirt
To keep what you love
That�s what you gotta do

Sayin� you love but you don�t
You give your love but you won�t
You�re stretching out your arms to something that�s just not there
Sayin� you love where you stand
Give your heart when you can

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

Sayin� you love but you don�t
You give your love but you won�t
Sayin� you love where you stand
Give your heart when you can

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me