Fiona is angry, Chris is not, and more ways for myspace to suck.

February 28, 2006

Hi. I am Liz, your diary entertainer for the evening.

So I thought I had exhausted all the ways I could make myspace make me feel like vomiting all over myself, but apparently not. Today I got an email from someone I used to work with at the newspaper in college. I checked out her profile and saw that she has like 5 different people who I also worked with at the paper in her top 8, and man...that just made me a little tiny bit nutso.

It just brought it all back to me, you know? How college was not about anything other than the next time I got to see Matt. It was about procrastinating every single thing until the last possible second. It was about being stagnant.

So, when I saw that Ryan and Amy, my editor and the photographer respectfully, got married, and that Ava is married and working for a major newspaper, and Christine married the guy she was always with and has this awesome marketing job...I started to feel regret, and a little shame, and it just kinda all snowballed from there and I kept thinking about how these people made college work for them when I made college somehow work AGAINST me. I'm awesome like that.

But it did make me feel better when I saw that the chick who emailed me, while she does work at a major newspaper, is doing the county government or some such beat. Man, just thinking about those godawful government and school board and whatthehellever meetings that I had to go to...I don't feel that bad about not being a reporter. I don't have it in me. It was fun while it lasted, but that's just not my thing.

In other news, Coldplay was awesome. Seriously. I knew they would be, but I had forgotten how seriously wonderful they were the last time I saw them. It didn't matter that there was probably about 50,000 more people at this concert than the last concert I went to, they were just really, really good. Especially "Politik." I seriously almost lost my shit when they played that song. But yeah...Chris Martin is one hell of a performer and we should all know that.

Fiona Apple on the other hand...man, that's one angry lady. I didn't really enjoy her very much. I mean...it was like she was screaming at us! I don't want to be screamed at during my concert enjoyment!

But all in all, it was good times. J was a pleasant enough concert partner. We had the shittiest of the shitty seats ever but it was all good. Yay, Coldplay.

So I finally, FINALLY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, found out about my raise on Monday. And what ensued might have been the highest my blood pressure has ever been. Why? Because I found out that my raise was a wonderfully brilliant 1.27%. Seriously. I mean, why even give me a raise? A 16 cent per hour raise? Why even fucking bother?

But I talked to Gay Supervisor about it and he was as outraged as I was. He talked to the HR chick about it and he explained things to me and what he said made sense and I'm calmer now and even feeling a little bad that I made such a big deal about it. But for a second there...yeah, I was about to explode.

By the way, Gay Supervisor is leaving in a month. I can't tell you how much that SUCKS ASS. It's a good deal for him, but for us, it sucks. He will be missed.

There is also this chick at work that I'm beginning to flat out hate. A big reason is that she has no pride in her work. I reviewed something she did and was like something a second grader could do. That really made me mad for some reason and I even told my boss about it. I really think this chick should be fired, not just because I hate her but because she flat out sucks. Like, she's totally oblivious to the rules of normal social conduct. It irritates the shit out of me, it really does.

Anyway. Yeah. Josh and I are all right. We're going to San Antonio on Thursday...it's our first little trip together, so it'll be interesting. We had some really enjoyable sex today, and I'm sure if you asked the neighbors they would agree with that. I'm sorry, neighbors, but damn, the boy is good at what he does!

In other boy news, Ali-Kat suggested that maybe I should write an email to Matt just to get some things off my chest. And I'm thinking that it might be okay to do this at this point. Because when this all happened almost a fucking year ago, I never really said anything. I wanted to be supportive and happy and rosy-cheeked and have him think that I was going to make it after all. But now, I have built up all these things that I wish I would have said, and now maybe it's time I got it off my chest. I don't even care what he says, I just have things to say to him. I don't know if that's the best course of action, but I think I'm going to do it. I think that it might just be necessary for my sanity.

I don't know about my life right now. It seems like, in many aspects, I need to shit or get off the pot. I just don't know which one I'm ready to do yet.

Rock out with your cock out.