There was some kissing.

January 28, 2005

Not to sound too dramatic or anything, but sometimes a day in your life comes along that totally changes everything, and I would have to say that yesterday was pretty much one of those days.

First, there was the whole Matt situation. After I had the Great Closure Conversation of 2005, it was like a huge weight had been lifted. It was like.. I finally closed the chapter of my book that has been worked on for 7 years. I'm done with it. It's over.

And then to make things extra fun, I went to Mike's last night. He was studying and I had to bribe him with homemade cookies, but I finangled my way over to his apartment. We watched Face/Off and did some hardcore cuddling, but this cuddling was not innocent cuddling. It was the kind where he has his hand on my leg and all my nerve endings are fucking screaming for more, and I can barely sit still because this boy makes me feel things I haven't felt in well.. a really long time.

And then there was the kissing. We just kinda turned to each other and there it was. It was so fantastically awesome that when we finally came up for air about 5 minutes into it, I said "Damn!" and he was like, "Yep." Just thinking about it now makes me all tingly inside. It was some good kissing, you guys. I remember the first time Matt kissed me, I had to actually stop and say, "Dude, this isn't working for me." But damn.. there's some chemistry working for us. And it is good.

And then there was more. You guys know me.. I like to talk about every single event that happens in my life. But as Brad Pitt said in Ocean's Twelve, it's not in my nature to be mysterious, but I can't talk about it and I can't talk about why. There's just some things that I need to not write about, and this is one of them.

But all I can say is.. damn. Just.. damn. Amazing. Fanfuckingtastic. Take my word for it.

Wooo.. I don't know how I'm going to manage to get any work done today, I'm just too flustered.

As for the rest of it, who knows? I like Mike. I like how we can be honest with each other, and I like that we have the same taste in a lot of stuff, and I like how he can wear shorts (Matt was just not able to wear shorts) and how he likes chicken and how he studies history and his fascination with Mustangs and just.. everything. But I don't know how far we can take it, and I'm trying not to get my hopes up quite yet about the future. But I like him. I want to take it further. I want to introduce him to my mom and take him to the farm to meet my dogs. But... I'm not going to get ahead of myself.

I'm going to stop talking before I get myself into trouble. Not that I'm not already in trouble, but you know what I mean.

Just.. damn.