Things I write to avoid working

May 11, 2006

So it's all very exciting 'cause good old Guns N Roses are playing 4 shows in New York City (at the Hammerstein Ballroom, not Madison Square Garden, but hey, come on) starting tomorrow! I would love to go to one of those concerts but yeah, it's far away, costs way too much and the tickets sold out way before I even thought about getting one. But this is huge! If Axl manages to show up relatively on time and keep his shit together...yeah. I'm excited about hearing about this gig. Go, Axl!

I would so love to see him again. I loved me my concert experience in Vegas, but come on! One time in, uh, what is it now? 15 years? That's just not right. Come to me, Axl!

Anyway, yeah, I haven't written in a long time and that's weird for me. It's not that I don't have anything to say, I'm just kinda trying to sort everything out. Things with Josh have been weird, a mixture of awesome and shitty, and it's just weird.

It's not that I didn't know it wasn't going to be easy when we first started out back in December. I knew it would be a challenge. I knew we had our past to move on from and our future would be based on that. I think I've done okay with moving on with the stupid past, but sometimes I think that maybe not. Maybe I fuck things up in the present because the past was so fucked up.

I DO fuck things up, I will admit that. Sometimes I can't just stop talking and not the smartest things will come out of my mouth. I think most of our conflicts could be avoided if I just shut the hell up every now and then. I don't know why I do that, I really don't. I don't ENJOY the conflict, the conflict sucks.

But again, it's not all conflict. We have a lot of good times together. Last week Ali-Kat came over and Josh cooked us some enchiladas and made some guacamole and margaritas and just sat back while Ali-Kat and I got shitfaced. It was a good night, especially because after she left we had some unbelivable drunken (on my part, anyway) sexual relations. Rawr!

So again, it's the high highs and the low lows. The highs are awesome and the lows kinda make me want to stick something in my eye. But even when sometimes I think it would be nice to be single and to do my own thing, I am committed to this relationship and its highs and lows and everything in between. I want to figure this out.

So, yeah. Other notes:
- I really want to watch the Shawshank Redemption soon.
- I want to watch CSI more than normal lately.
- Chris? Seriously, you assholes eliminated CHRIS? Who are you gonna pick now, fucking Elliot? I gave up on AI a few months ago, but still, Chris is SOOO good! And now he's gone?! I don't...understand!
- I think I am starting to have a serious crush on John Corbett. I've always liked him, although he kinda bothered me as Aiden on SATC, but that's only because he wasn't Mr. Big. But yeah, he's hot and it seems like he's just always gonna be hot.
- I need to work out tonight.
- My wrists hurt. They started hurting this time last year, too. All the typing 8 + hours a day can't be good.
- Apparently me and my old roommate owe money to my old apartment. That sucks, but it did give me a chance to email her and that is good. I miss her doggy. Ah, PD. He is good.

That is all.

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