Farm guy stealing cousins, mean cousins, and donkeys.

November 26, 2004

Thanksgiving ruined my good karma buzz! True story. But now I'm watching Clueless and that just makes it all better.

So pretty much all my relatives on my dad's side came for Thanksgiving fesitivies. There was also many dogs - 8 to be exact, and at any one time, there was usually about 5 or 6 of them in the house. I heart my puppies.

In Farm Guy news, my cousin Jenny thought she would swoop in here with her midwest accent and her red vest and claw her way into my territory! It wasn't pretty, let me tell you. I mean, sure, yes, okay, he's not technically MINE, and she has every right to do what she wants with him, and she has no idea that I like him anyway, but DAMNIT, WOMAN! They even flirted when they were cleaning the kitchen last night! I didn't know if was possible to look sexy when cleaning a plate of green bean casserole!

I think it was mostly disconcerting because he's never flirted with me like that and I thought I was making progress. My brother said, "He's not going to sleep with the boss's daughter!" And well! Maybe not, but I still feel like I'm up to the challenge. I don't know why, and I'm not questioning it anymore. It's just something I feel like I need to do!

I did get a hug before I left today, so that was squishy. And Jenny is only here once every couple of years anyway, so whatever. It's this new chick he's apparently dating that I have to worry about now. What... ever.

Other things I wish to talk about regarding the situation but don't have enough patience to do so: push up bra, vibes, brussel sprouts, golf car, butts, keys, and blah.

The turkey was really awesomely good, though. I had a turkey-cranberry sandwich this morning. It was yummy.

My other cousin thought it would be fun to come sit next to me on the sofa, pat me on the stomach and exclaim "What is THAT?" And I'm all, "Uh, my big fat stomach?" And he's all, "Well, when are we gonna get rid of that? Diet and exercise! Blah blah blah I'm an asshole!" Man alive.. I really didn't understand the point of that. Did he think by pointing it out to me I was going to have a sudden realization that hey! I AM overweight! I had NO idea!

So this morning we had a nemisis confrontation and I let him know what I felt about the situation. It was productive. He blamed it on the wine. Repeat after me: What.Ever.

My dad and Donna got into another brawl which they might not recover from. That added to my bad karma aura that was going on up in there.

But! We did get two new donkeys. Future Stepbrother named them, so of course they're called Donkey and.. Shrek. Good times.

So anyway, that's about it. I'm about to go to my mom's to have a much more fun and relaxed happy time.

Matt keeps bringing up going to Vegas for New Years, and I'm starting to dread having to tell him that I'm just not going to go. Even if I wasn't working and even if I could afford it.. I don't want to spend a week in a car with him at this point. There's really not much appeal there, and that's so very strange for me to say because it's never been true.. up until now. I just don't want to have to struggle to find something to talk about on day 5 of the trip, while we eat at yet another restaurant. I don't want to rush around and deal with his massive road rage when it comes to the secret shopping we'll ultimately have to do. I just don't want to go. I want to find someone new to spend New Years with this year. You know?

I know.

I'm boring myself. I'm also starting to worry about the fact that I'm always narrating my own life in my head, thinking of things to write in here while they actually happen. That seems like it should be a problem.

"You're a virgin who can't drive."

*****

a year ago..
"It's entries like those that make me see how, even though it sucked to be in pain like that, it's also really beautiful. I mean.. you can't really live your life without knowing what true pain feels like, because then you won't know what beauty is because you haven't felt the pain. That makes sense, right?"

2 years ago...
"But it seems like people don't really want to give you time to be depressed anymore. I thought I was joking with my friends yesterday about having anger issues, and when the chick wrote me that note expressing concern, I appreciated it. But come on! Can't someone be allowed to be angry and upset after the demise of a 5 year relationship? I knew she probably wouldn't understand.. she's only 21 and married already, for fuck's sake."

3 years ago...
"So here I am, stalking my ex boyfriend, when I could have just called him. Yes, I was feeling like a big dork. I didn't even see a red Camaro the first 7 times I looked through the parking lot. But then.. there it was. A pretty red Camaro. Which made me feel like I wasn't completely losing my mind."